Einsamkeit
Friday, March 31, 2006
  There is a beam of hope...
I felt I was being toyed around for this past week. Whenever I come home, all nervous and checked my email inbox and the house phone's missed calls. I saw no news of Temasek Polytechnic. All the hopes, the elation that I would get from seeing positive reply have been destroyed by the total void of replies. Then the sadness crashes into my heart and breaking it even more. If I happen to be listening to Mutter, things would have been much much much more worse. The only thing I didn't do is to cut myself, but that is an act of foolishness, so I shan't do it. In addition, I have not been eating well recently. Imagine only eating a puny fish burger to last you let's say 10 hours? Hunger has became a trivial issue now. Okay, imagine that whole dread and wait, randomly popping out of your heart the entire time for around 2 to 3 weeks. You are getting close to what I am undergoing emotionally now. Close, I remind you. Close. But not yet.

Upon reaching today which was supposed to be the LAST day of the appeal result release, I clicked on my email inbox like what I did for the past few days or weeks, this time, I am totally worn emotionally, I just said to myself, 'Whatever. In or out. It's okay.' As usual, no replies. I have gotten so used to that dreadful feeling, it has became part of me. So I went on to do my usual surfing, then this New Email Box popped up and it says TP Admission Matters. My heart dropped to its blackest and foul abyss, htting the base. A force so strong, I could hear my heart rupture and feel its contents flowing out.

I said to myself, 'That's it. I'm staying in SRJC. No hope already.' And at the very same moment, my eyes swept past the short email message, and this is what it said:

"Your appeal is currently receiving attention and you will be informed lastest by end of April."

I knew it. This cannot be the end of it. Cannot be, and it must not be.

The smell of hope is brilliant.

I am not to be easily defeated,
Ling
31st March 2006.


 
Monday, March 27, 2006
  The voidness.
Amor E Morte - Cradle of Filth

Her bouquets are wilted
Too long has She slept
Their cruel red mouths darkened
To bowed silhouettes
I saw in a new moon
With Her scent on my breath
But then all to soon
Came the hunger for flesh

I held Her in eyes like necropoli
Laying Her on a tomb with a view
Lighting Her from Her feet
To the stars in Her hair
Drove sweet blood to Her throat
And My lips parted there

(In the tone of splintered bone)
She screams benighted
My limbs ignite
A carneal carnivore
On all fours to go...

An ebon Nemesis
From torture gardens of Dis
Having never breathed an Eve
As far narcotic as this
Two spellbound hellhounds
Hearts pounding loud
Racing Heaven out of focus
Under quicksilver clouds

"God is maimed come let us prey..."
To lunar deities that pave deadways
Twixt the living and the grave
Amor e Morte
To cast our fearl shadows there
We made Love bleed on a Deathbed shared
Where, begging Me to feed
To best be Were...

I licked Her wounds and ate Her rare

Argentinum spurred
Her watnon words incurred
A sin ridden tongue
To open trading in fur
Never were those gates of pearl
So rubbed to their cusp
Never were the Worlds above
So bitten with the bestial...

Seraphim fell like guillotines
Giving gracious head

Instead of harking prophecies
And how our brother sang
Amor e Morte
In the thick evergreens
Theirs was a chorus for raucous souls
Shifting shape and lifting napes
To commemorate
Erotic stains
Amor e Morte

Unfasten thy masque
Come skyclad to my arms
Leave thy gown a dark pool at thy feet
I yearn musky valleys that no Man hath seen
The chill keen of stars
Over Yew and deep wooded ravines
A hidden meridian
Where Midian may be...

In black antlered glades
Encunted in this forest Goddess
She whispers My name
I buck under flames
Animal nitrates
Howling through my veins

I ride riptides that wrest and writhe to the fore
New lusts ecllipsing lips
That brought me to this verge of War
With inner beasts unleashed
To feast, fuck and run
Rampart in chase of She wolf pacts
Forged on heat with setting Suns

I love the night
It would murder My soul
Should I ever fall blind
For though thy flesh haunts
I keep also in mind
The stampede of clouds
From Dusk's predatory sky

Purple versed like the funeral hearse
That first turned thee over to My...
Unbridled kiss when I found thee in mist
Dressed for the sepulchre
My Demon bride...

"God is maimed come let Us prey..."
To Lunar Deities that pave deadways
Twixt the living and the grave
Amor e Morte
Ours was a chorus for raucous souls
Shifting sape and lifting nape
To commemorate
Erotic stains

Amor e Morte
Amor e Morte

XXXXXXXX

As you can see, I have fell in love in Cradle of Filth completely and especially Thy Count Backwerdz or Dani Filth. That guy just kicks all wannabe wax-lyricers' arses. I heart Dani!

Anyways, there's still no news from Temasek Poly despite my strong urge to get in there. I only have 4 more days of hope left... These 4 days will be nerve-wrecking and the longest 4 days that I have undergone. Please... Just... Let... Me... In... Please. I beg you.

In the meantime, JC stuff aren't that hard after all... Now that I have seen what JC stuff are like, secondary school stuff looks like uber child's play to me now. It is so freaking simple and basic! I wonder why I used so much energy to it...

There is a lack of inspiration for me to continue blogging. Shall stop here for this post.

Ich will Temasek Poly,
Ling
27th march 2006 AD

 
Sunday, March 26, 2006
  Bitte...
My heart is in total chaos. Adrenaline has been pumping in my veins. I can't do anything without with a disrupting thought of my poly appeal.

Jia Hao, Calven, Jacinath all got their positive replies from the polys that they appealed to already. What is mine?! Where?! Please just say a Yes, my dearest TP! I really really really really wanna get into TP. Please...

Okay, I should stop here as I am ranting non-stop and being desperate... But I really want to get into Temasek Poly!

So far, there's quite a number of people I know is in TP, there are Aaron, Alden, Jia Hao, William, Edwin, Mac, plus a whole group of Soft people. If my appeal were successful, me and William are going to start a flourish club in TP. I will be The Co-Founder! How cool is that?! Plus, in addition to the reasons of an exciting life in TP, there's a whole bunch of Soft people posted there as well. We can have TP Soft gatherings and talk about music together! OMG, Flourish and metal music together in a cool place plus the fact that you are studying what you really like only, that totally kicks some arse. I am yearning for that, so badly... Ich will dich, TP! Und Ich warte auf dich for alle Tagen!

I got a feeling that I won't get into Biomedical science, but Biotechnology, but that's fine as well, as long as I can get away from SRJC!

Please say a Yes, my dearly TP! Oh how I yearn for thee, sweet TP...

[prays as hard as a stimulated bloke that I'd get a positive response from TP on monday]

Once again, I reinforce this. I WANT TEMASEK POLYTECHNIC! I do not care anything else.

Ich will TP für alle Tagen,
Ling
26th March 2006 AD
 
Saturday, March 25, 2006
  Have no idea.
Due the mounting worry of me not getting able to appeal successfully into Temasek Poly, I went down to TP itself and have a talk with Course Manager. I really hope they can appreciate my effort in coming down twice, once for the appeal, once for the 'interview'. Please... just... let... me... in... I beg you... Please. Please. Bitte...

Well, the Course Manager said she would take special notice of my case and seriously consider me. I hope so, really. I really want TP... My gut feeling tells me that my appeal might be succcessful, let's just hope so... Hope for the best. Prepare for the worst. Have faith, as advised by Travis who graduated from TP.

I want TP! Badly!

Anyways, ever since school started, my novelette has been on a halt indefinitely and it's a wasted effort, I have planned on the plot and everything, but my worn body and soul (all thanks to school) have disagreed on my writing endeavour. See? Jc makes you so tired and fucked up, you can't do anything you used to like to. There's something seriously screwed with Singapore's education system. It's still too acamedic after various changes, how do you expect creative people to emerge who are ground-breaking when all the young people are fucking tired every fucking day?! There will no time to do anything at all to let the young think for themselves and all.

Fucking. Conformity.

No wonder Kev can be so successful in his magic/flourish, as he's in Singapore America School, and not any MOE-governed school. No wonder Buck twins can flourish so well (in both meanings) and be so successful in their magic dvds, because they are in fucking USA!

Fuck. I hate this.

MOE is restricting us, making us conform unnessecarily. This is wrong! I will not conform and you cannot force me to. I see no point in getting so tired because of studies... Tyler Durden says,' You are not your studies. You are not your A Level Grades. You are not how many As you can score. You are not how well behaved you are in school. You are not the Student Council title.' Come on, get a life. Breathe. Life is much more than school. Think. Do not follow. Think. For yourself.

Other than the above angst-filled comments, I have a few more to go. =)

I see no point in doing Economics. Just don't like. No reasons.
I see no point in doing PW. Come on, people use Google everyday.
I see no point in doing General Paper. I think critically already.
I see no point in doing PE. I am not going to be a runner in anyway. Sweating wastes body fluid. <>
  • Rammstein's Mutter.
  • Cradle of Filth's Dusk and Her Embrace.
  • Immortal's Pure Holocaust.
  • A dozen of Tally Hos.
  • Interview with a Vampire VCD
  • Can't think of anything...
  • Actually, I feel rather contented. I just need a fucking mp3 player! Herr Diskmann is dying.
Random: I feel extremely hungry... I wanna have juicy chicken right now.

Bah! TP, let me in! I will be highly grateful!

Nocturnal death knells of keyboard typing reverberates my void house,
Ling
25th March 2006 AD

 
Thursday, March 23, 2006
  Am I starting to like SRJC?
OMG Jesus christ! Am I starting to like SRJC? Fuck. No. This can't be happening. I forbid it to happen. Hell No.

The reasons being my growing liking to That Sad Place are that, the people really appreciate my magic, there aren't many hecklers around like those in NCHS to ruin everything I try to do. That is just fantastic. The feeling of being engulfed by a circle of audience is just brilliant and refreshing. It feels I got back my old self again, not being that loner I have been for the past few days. Now I have people calling me The Magic Girl by many including one who is a rabid fan of yours truly. And he, also known as Elfie, gave me Oreos as a token of appreciation. Thanks Mr Bedok! =) I appreciate you watching my Pre-Lect Magic Show. And I swear, oreos are the weirdest token of appreciation ever.

And, to add to the reasons why I am beginning to like that place is that there's a rocker dude in my class! He's Josiah, also the CG rep and aspiring Student Councillor cum Rugby player, a really vocal person, like Nicholas Tan back in 4I. Anyways, it's so scarce to find anybody who doesn't listen to pop or whatever crap that is in SRJC, rock is good enough. So Josiah might most probably become my best buddy if I stay in SRJC. And he jams as well! I wonder what instrument he plays... Should be either electric guitar or bass. I'm rather looking forward to a chat with him on all things rock and metal. \m/ Rock on, Hail, whatever!

Whatever it is, I still want TP. Full Stop. Period. =D

Oh TP, oh my lovely TP, how I yearn for thee...

Please give me a fucking reply soon, TP!

I still want TP,
Ling
23th March 2006 AD
 
Tuesday, March 21, 2006
  Over.
It's over. All over.

New me. New life. New startings. New people. New whatever.

Thank you for everything.

Best of luck for you.

Auf Wiedersehen.
 
  Motivated
At this point of time, I am really very spurred and driven in all aspects. Reasons being, I just watched a whole tonne of flourish videos and getting really inspired to work even harder on my flourishes. Secondly, I was flinging my head off like a pendulum sped up at a 100 periods whilst watching Live Aus Berlin, singing along with Herr Lindemann and getting a good workout. Metal music NEVER fail to revitalise and ressurect me.

Next, Dan and Dave just announced they will be embarking on a project to shoot 2, yes, 2 DVDs this year. Yes! I am so getting them, especially for the flourish one!

This was what Kevin said in the forums:

[quote]
Wow!

One on magic and one on... ace prods? You guys sure have a shitload that really inspired me in that area.

I wonder what they'll be called...

"Hooked on Dan and Dave"

"Dan and Dave do Dallas"

"Pasteboard Playground"

"What the Buck!?"

"Sybling Rivalry"

"The Good, the Bad, and the Buck Brothers"

"Lock, Stock, and Two Open Faros"

"TROTSTCSA- The Rest Of The Stuff That Chris Sucks At"


Nah. Probably none of those.

-Kev
[/quote]

Hahaha!

Anyways, to witness the sheer skillzorz of The Buck Twins, click Spring Jam on the left sidebar. But this time, it will be more impactful as The Buck Twins would have improved dunno-how-many-folds ever since the release of The System.

On a more serious note, the class sorting result is out today and I got into 1S03, which was my first choice, which is Maths, Chemistry, Biology, and H1 Economics. My class is female-dominated, with 15 females and only a handful of 5 males. Aww poor guys... [pats on the guys' shoulders] Bah, anyways, I still want to get into Temasek Poly! I want TP! I want TP! TP, please give me a reply soon, so I can quit going to That Sad Place. Just say Yes, I'd be tremendously grateful! Bitte.... bitte...

If it were really some awful news of my appeal failing, I will have to face The Midget for my Economics.... which is not to any of my advantages. I hate The Midget, 'cause her arms are so short. Okay, bad reason to hate a person for, but, I still loathe her.

Because....

I crashed H1 History lecture today and it was damn cool, at least better than The Midget. They talked about The Cold War. Me, being the History noob, sat and got thoroughly mesmerized by the lecturer. Okay I am weird, I actually favour History! Yes I do, I just never had the chance to do it... And why did I stupidly go choose Economics because the majority is? Shucks. That sucks. Back to the mesmerizing lecture, although I knew nothing about The Cold War except that Stalin is on USSR's side and Churchill is the British representation and that Roessevolte is teh big daddy in Amerika, I learnt something more about the Polish people during World War 2 and seriously, Ich liebe History! The lecturer showed us clips from The Pianist on the scenes where Der Nazis captured and killed the Jews and all that Holocaust related stuff. As I have watched the movie before, I knew what was going to happen and I was grinning wide as The English Canal when Der Nazis pulled the triggers and blood was spilled on ground like spilled milk.

Damn! History ist Gut!

There is always a vague blur of time when my imagination fails me... I shall stop here.

Listening to Buck Dich LOUD in mein Zimmer,
Ling
21st March 2006 AD
 
Monday, March 20, 2006
  Finally.
The reason why I am updating this so quickly is because I am actually feeling happy enough to blog unlike the period when I was updating as irregularly as a puberty girl. Haha. I am so crapped out.

The reason why I am so eurphoric, well, not really THAT eurphoric, is that I have found like-minded people in SRJC whose common interest is to pon all crappy programmes like Health and Fitness Workshop.

Here goes the crazy ponning action:

First thing first, I walked into the canteen toilet for whatever reasons I think you are intelligent enough to infer. When I am done and not yet out of my cubicle, I heard a wave of audible murmurs that distinguishingly sound like a secret Escape Plan. I wanted to pon as well, so I thought for a while, and finally decided to join them into the Grand Espace Plan. Being people with similar interestes, they accepted me into The Anti-Crap Party without much hesitation and aided me in this cruical getaway. I am truly grateful to them, because if weren't for them and their impromptu generousity, I won't be able to tell you, my loved reader-fiends, the Horrors in That Place. This is real-life testimonal, heed it well. If you see any lone souls wearing the grab with that SRJC collarpin, leave them alone. They are sad enough. Really.

Enough of that whole grateful shit, so we decided to walk out in threes, all being chatty and busy doing Something and distract the old and MOSTLY HARMLESS guards. So yeah, we got out of That (Sad) Place rather unscathed.

Anyways, anyhows, I have thought of a topic to research on for my PW. Heavy Metal Culture! I'm choosing Momentum anyways. I will so enjoy doing this, I swear the teachers will go,' Okay, okay. Enough!' Lol. I kidd.

Bah, talk is talk, I still want to get into Temasek Poly by hook or by crook or by rook or by book (book?!) or by whatever that ends with 'ook'! JC isn't my cup (or mug) of beer, cup of tea is overrated. The reason is simple. I hate beer. Beer is bitter. And I spit anything that is bitter. =) I drink teh 1337 Vodka.

I WANT TP! I WANT TP! I WANT TP! I WANT TP! [carries a placard that says TP is teh 1337 5cH0.0L! and walks around in SRJC, with a self-satisified smile]

And, the sad part of this post, Jedi Master JasPas Christ Deck has prophecised the Coming of His A Levels and thus concluded His ultimate decision to stop the glorious art of flourishing for a total of 8 months while He retreats back to His Abode to study His scriptures.

So Our Messiah came and went. This is the Start of A New Age.

With the pre-ordained Knowledge gained from His much-valued teachings, we will strive for The JasPas Perfection in all things flourish and continue our Journey to The West Side Chaos. Things have since changed ever since JasPas ceased wielding His deck, Jackson 5 is no longer a band consisted of young black singers, it has evolved into a mega looking cut invented by The Buck Twins. Aw, see how fast time has past? We clutch to our Hearts in utmost melancholy as we witness The Loss of The God's Messanger, and contort our faces in grimace and hold back out swelling tears. Aw! The pain!

Okay, I'm fine. I'm fine.

Alrighty folks, time's up and I gotta bid you farewell.

Still in shock of The Lost Messiah,
Ling
20th March 2006.
 
Sunday, March 19, 2006
  Philosphy for me.

You scored as Philosophy. You should be a Philosophy major! Like the Philosopher, you are contemplative and you enjoy thinking about the purpose for humanity's existence.

Theater


100%

Chemistry


100%

Biology


100%

Philosophy


100%

Linguistics


100%

Journalism


100%

Sociology


100%

Engineering


100%

Psychology


100%

Art


100%

Anthropology


100%

Mathematics


92%

English


92%

Dance


75%

What is your Perfect Major? (PLEASE RATE ME!!<3)
created with QuizFarm.com

So, I am supposed to be a Philosophy maniac.

I knew it... I have been thinking along that path since secondary 2, but didn't go research on it until recently after my O levels.

So, people, await for the next Nietzsche! =)

Posing a classical Nietzsche stance,
Ling
19th March 2006 AD
 
  Some updates.
It seems like I haven't been updating regularly even since the start of school. Nonetheless, I'd try my very best to keep you, my beloved reader-fiends, updated on my recent morbid thoughts and accursed whereabouts.

Now. Where exactly to begin in this morass of thoughts?

First off, Operation Pon is a roaring success, I felt as though I have escaped from a concentration camp, which is rather true to a certain extent. The subsequent roaming around at Orchard ressurected me in every manner, making me feel so much more alive than being a zombie in school. Then came the march holidays which are short-lived indeed, being one week. To futhur reinforce the love for the school, those horrible fuckers made us go back to school for holiday lectures. I coined a brand new term for lectures, I call them 'The Lectocaust', lectures and holocaust? So yeah. The Lectocaust spans over the period of 4 fucking days, but of course, being a rebel of me, skipped some lessons. The only good thing about JC is that they don't give a fuck whether you attend lectures or not, so hehe. I present to you, Operation Pon II: Terrible Tuesday! There's only PE and Chinese on Tuesday! So FUCK that and let's pon. =) Anyways, I'd really hope that I could get into Temasek Poly... [prays]

Screw everything academic now.

Count Backwerdz, or more commonly known as Dani Filth from Camp Cradle has generously updated us with news of the production of their latest album. And, surprise, surprise, that Bam bootlicker, Ville Valo from H.I.M will be featured in the latest opus of The Filth. Interesting combination there. Soulful, sexy and arousing Finnish vocals and disturbing, werewolf-like and ear-splitting English shrieks, I wonder how they will pull it off. But, as Dani has promised, this would be the best Filth album yet, I will trust Dani. Dani hasn't been too well these few days, and he can't touch booze being regimented in a yeast-free diet, let's all pray in vigil for our Brother for his quick recovery of health. Take care, Count Backwerdz!

To read more about Cradle's studio update: click here.

Random: I totally adore Dani Filth! I can go insane.

And, during these period of intellect void, I have stoned and thought of these various pointless stuff.

If I were to get married, the theme song to use would be none other than Heirate Mich from Rammstein! So imagine, that song being played loud in the restuarant when me and my the other half walk down the isle. Uber kickarse! Other than that detail, I would like to arrive in a hearse as well, unlike those conventional crapped out white Mercedes Benz. Be creative, pals! My wedding would kick Marilyn Manson's arse, well not really, I must still respect MM.

I got myself a new phone! So say Auf Wiedersehen zu mir spielen Telefone! My latest muggle gadget of communciate is teh 1337 s3xY RazR V3! Everthing was sweet except one part, that battery flap. I have been trying to pry out that fucked up flap for around 3 hours and nothing even moved. Great, just great. Blah... Oh! My sister helped me, and she took less than 5 minutes. Someone fucking pull the trigger at my temples please!

And, i have just realised this. It's already the end of March, one quarter of 2006 is gone! Jesus christ, time really flies. And, more shockingly, I realised that I have absolutely done nothing ever since Novemeber last year. Yeah, I rock! Stoning rules. =)

And, I got my pay cheque! Hello shopping spree! Hehe. Embracing my feminine side. lol.

Alright, nothing much more to rant about.

In Filth, we trust,
Ling
19th March 2006 AD
 
Tuesday, March 14, 2006
  Hallo!
I know, I know. It's been one whole week since I have updated. Now, now, keep silent while I get my lazy arse or hands moving.

First thing first, Ashford's Tornado DVD Trailer is out! And, well, of course, I got flattered so much after watching the trailer video, which can also be found here, PUTFILE BANNED SINGAPORE! Okay, I should be humble and modest. It's a virtue... =) Ashford should try featuring me as a bonus or something in the DVD, I believe it'd be good. Haha. Kidding! I'm not that good yet.

Secondly, someone gave me a link on the chemical side of Hell. It's really interesting. For all chemistry nerds out there, you'd love this essay on Hell. Click here! I believe Hell is Exothermic, as Hell emits out heat energy from the rectants which consists from various sinners and blasphemers alike. The reaction between the sinners and Hell was so great, the heat generated within the reactions was way greater than the heat generated from the reformed sinners aka the Products. Thus viola! You get an Exothermic reaction! Another alternative reason could also be that Herr Satan is a selfish person, he depises hot weather despite his title as Satan much to his chargin. He wanted his infernal (yeah right) chambers to be cooled at all times, thus made all the heat to be emitted outwards. Thus, DA TA! Exothermic again. Hell - what a practical place.

Anyways, on a saner note, JC orientation has pissed me off as much so that I carried out Operation Pon on last friday and bid farewell to the dumb orientation programmes at 12.30 pm! I rock! From what I can vaguely remember, my house, Sparta was leading all the way till the last day, but I was told today that Athens won in the end! I was dumbfounded. WTH. How can this be possible in anyway? OMG. Bah anyways, after much deep thoughts, I have came up with the conclusion that JC isn't for me. Metalheads cannot survive in JCs.

They'd ask, 'Hey, so what kind of music you listen to?'
I said, somewhat proud, 'Oh metal music. Nice stuff.'
They'd go like this or something like this, 'What? Metal? Plastic? Lol.'
I'd go, 'FUCK YOU.', then leave them.

Haha!

Hence, I think it's best to appeal to Temasek Poly which had been my target since the start of sec 4. I really hope I can get into my preferred Biomedical course. The mere thought of struggling with GP/Chinese/PE/other random school crap is disturbing. I already have had enough of SS/Geography/Chinese/PE in NCHS. I do not wish to allow to myself suffer anymore. Enough. Is. Enough. [prays hard I'd get in]

Wow. I am surprised that I could still remember my Chemistry stuff! Had my first JC lecture today, was Chemistry. It's about Atoms, Molecules, and that Mole concept. I absorbed rather quickly and with ease. I actually enjoyed it. Hah.

Anyways, I just bought Cradle of Filth's Vemprie EP. It's fucking good for a 6 song only CD. Especially for Queen of Winter, Throned. That song is pure epic passion for whole 10 minutes, fuelling your metal lust to their full potential, launching yourself into a frenzied bout of headbanging. Pure gold. Simply adored Cradle of Filth. Dani, you rock my world! =)

Alright, that's it for now!

To feed on the blood of the weak,
Ling
14th March 2006 AD
 
Tuesday, March 07, 2006
  SRJC
I am in no mood to write paragraphs, so I will just do it in bullet-form.

  • My OG is Sparta Delta. Yes. Red house. Yes, Gryffindor. Ugh.
  • Thebes logo is nice, a snake coiling around the rod. Very Slytherin-ish.
  • I had my own version of The College Anthem, now it rocks even more and sounds very weird to an untrained ear. [For more information on my version of the lyrics, do email me.]
  • When my OGLs asked if I were a damn vegetarian, I almost said I am a Mein-Teilatrian. Hah!
  • The 2 teachers who caught my attention are Mr Edwin Tan and Mr Philips Tan, they remind me of Mr Neo too much. I really miss Mr Neo and al things NCHS and the air con hall most of all.
  • The food was okay. At least better than NCHS.
  • The notorious song, Bestrafe Mich is playing in my mind all the way.
  • I was imagining too many ought-to-be censored stuff, but I will continue to do so.
  • The first day was a latent blur for me, I can't remember much.
  • The second day is okay, equally crappy.
  • The school hall is on the first floor, which is very weird.
  • I am still a loner, as usual, but of a more serious degree.
  • I have not spoken to anybody in a proper conversation yet.
  • I am feeling like crap inside.
  • I am surviving on metal music, the hope of meeting Justin and my thoughts.
  • I have not revealed that I am a magician or a metal music maniac yet. That's quite a feat. Due to the fact that I am rather famous in NCHS for those 2 things.
  • I miss Fantasma magic and Toy R Us.
  • I miss slacking at home!
  • I miss reading fanfictions by novel-load.
  • Enough said.
Auf Wiedersehen. Tomorrow is another hellish day. Wish me luck, I will need it.

Melancholy overwhelms me,
Ling
7th march 2006 AD
 
Sunday, March 05, 2006
  A new beginning.
Dearest reader-fiends of this blog, tomorrow is an important day. New school. New Beginning. New People. New place. New personality to adapt. New me, basically. So you have probably guessed, I got into a damn junior college. Yeah, got into Serangoon Junior College. Justin's my senior! =) Hello flourishing fun in school!

First thing first, I really hope there's some metalheads there, so I can at least have some 'Court Jesters' for accompanying purposes. Or better still, my sec school people or SMC people, although the latter group is more relieving to see. Sec school people = EEW. Bah, I just wish there's a better breed of people there, unlike my previous dwelling, NCHS. Damn. Proletariats.

Secondly, I am feeling a little weird that I am actually going back to school! It's been around 4 months plus since I had went to school for a real purpose, that is around 120 days. That is fucking long. I don't know if I could still tap into the 'studying' frequency, but I'll try. Sigh.

And, I am half looking forward and half dreading for tomorrow. Talk about the looking forward part first. There's finally something to do, except to read fanfictions and thinking too much, polluting my mind. I look forward to meeting new people, expanding my already wide social circle. I equally look forward to absorbing new knowledge in school, I am Jack's nerdy side. I look forward to slowly spread my name as a magician in school and getting 'famous' like what I did in NCHS. But that isn't very important, I had enough of performing after working for Fantasma.

The dreading half now. For around 120 days, I have been a total computer whore. Here's my schedule for my 'Stoner's life'.

  • Wake Up at around 10 am.
  • Brush teeth and on the computer.
  • Check forums and emails.
  • Blare metal music loud and reply in forums.
  • Look for stuff to eat. Usually nothing.
  • Sing to myself to the songs and headbang.
  • Start reading fanfictions.
  • Break. Check forums again.
  • Read abit more.
  • Buy lunch from downstairs.
  • Eat and read more at the same time.
  • Listen to more metal.
  • Go youtube.com for music videos.
  • Check forums.
  • Chat with people on msn.
  • Read abit more fanfictions.
  • Read more.
  • Flourish in front of the webcam.
  • Brother is back. Break from computer.
  • Read my novels while brother is using computer.
  • He's gone, use computer again.
  • Talk crap with Siyang all day long on msn.
  • Thinking of weird stuff.
  • Listen to more metal.
  • Check forums.
  • Usually it's already 12 am here.
  • Then, read my novels on my bed with metal playing at the background.
  • Finally sleeps at around 2 am.
  • Rest. Repeat. Rest. Repeat.
Yes, this is my life for the past hundred days. I gotten so used to it, the computer is like fused to my soul and body. I seriously do not know how am I going to survive without this muggle thing. I think I am going to miss all the fanfictions and stuff, especially talking crap with siyang and those fanfictions. Maybe I should have a book to record out my dirty thoughts so as to keep me sane? Most of all, the waking up part. I have been sleeping around 2 or 3 am and waking at 10 or 11 am, skipping breakfast entirely, for a hundred days. Oh JasPas Christ, I have no idea how to get back to reality. =S

Bah, I am a kindergarten kid. Shoot me. Ma!!! I don't wanna go school! LOL. Kidding!

Tomorrow - A Milestone for me,
Ling
5th March 2006 AD
 
Thursday, March 02, 2006
  One Year Anniversary.
Happy Birthday, Once upon an atrocity! You are finally one year old! Look how much you have grown? [sobs like a proud parent whilst looking at a healthy and growing child] Make a wish, boy! Blow the candles! Today is your day! XD

Okay, enough of the birthday crap. But seriously, this blog has came a long way. From a few rants here and there to a massive storage of uber crap spat out from none other than yours truly. It's truly amazing how fast time flies. I will devote more time into developing this venue to vent out all my pent up nonsense.

Back to a more serious note, in the past few days, I have;

  1. Bought a Caravan deck. It turned out it's Aviators inside, and they are air cushioned! 1 Dollar Air Cushioned deck! Whoo!
  2. Had a undercharged Subway meal. Ordered Subway Melt at first, the cashier heard wrongly, it became 'Ham', so I saved $3. =)
  3. Watched Rock School, and is inspired by the Tucker twins. They are officially my role models for my kids. =) I would very like to see my kids proclaiming, 'Long live Metal (or Rock)' and pointing \m/ everywhere they go. I will be so proud of them.
  4. Watched Saw 2. It was mediocre.
  5. Flourished.
  6. Created a wicked looking ace production, it's all done by and in one hand. Total workout for the hand. It's called Sehnsucht production, due to my obsession over Rammstein.
  7. Flourished even more.
  8. Lazed around at home.
  9. Read alot of various fanfictions.
  10. Totally neglected my sanity.
I am Jack's stoning and zonked out side,
Ling.
2nd March 2006 AD
 
The human destiny is forever limited by the idiocy of bureaucracy and the excesses of social expectations. - LingNemesis, 2007 C.E.

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Location: Singapore

Metal-Listener. Card Flourisher. Aspiring Philosopher. Selective Mugger. Ubermensch-to-be. Inspired by Dharma. Nihilist. The Almost Misanthrope. Yogini. Film Enthusiast. Into everything Occult and the Esotercism. Anti-Pretentious Social Situations. Anti-Religion. Anti-Normal. Observer of This Fucked-Up World. Autodidact. Philomath. Capricorn Cusp Aquarius. Leo Ascendent. Taurus Moon Sign. Economic Left/Right: -1.88 Social Libertarian/Authoritarian: -2.05.

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