After reading Vika's latest blog entry, I realised I need solitude, at the very moment, really badly too. All the people poking around me, talking far too much for anybody's health (what's worse is what they said are not at all constructive) and the noises made by the phone. Someone shouldn't have invented the damn phone. The noises it create are absolutely nerve-whacking, worse than the sound of "Mathematics", anyway. Last but not least, the various absurdities of the humankind and its ugly society.
Being such a hopeless nihilist-cum-misanthrope, like yours ghouly, do not see the point of chasing after achieving the status of a ''successful JC student who only knows their lecture notes (that will define him as a productive citizen or not in his later life)". It's so ridiculous. I have came to a grand conclusion that a mere formal education do not and will not bring any form of happiness as we, humans, are such flagrant assholes will never be, in anyway, contented. Sigh.
Time, if you decide to be kind, please do fast forward to 2 months later. I thank you profusely.
I just want to walk in some thick, primary forests with even thicker canopies, with Burzum's Tohmet playing in my mp3, then settling down at the clearing or beside a fjord/lake (dreamy sigh, I can only visualise such intense beauty), and looking up into the night's sky, observing the stars. How wholesomely appealing. Nature's awe. So capitvating. Sigh sigh.
A medley of odd things.
So, it's life after the much-anticipated preliminary exams. Somehow school feels different now, there is a general atmosphere of "Ah great, I have finished the prelims, why am I in school?!".
Ignoring that fact, me and Ren Hui met up for lunch, someone whom I hadn't met for a long while, ever since the Mitre Hotel phototaking trip back in May. Yes, we resumed our Subway diet, only to find the price of Cold Cut Trio to have risen, to $4.30. Damn it. Anyhow, we then proceeded to walk aimlessly around City Hall/Esplanade/Clarke Quay/Raffles Place area. Ren Hui introduced to me to the hobby of "tourist-waving". I must say it's a nice thing to do, if I decide to be seen as utterly odd. We then unneccessarily splurged on a tea-break at Starbucks by Singapore River (is it? I'm not too sure.), where I drank my third cup of tea for the day; one at home before school, one in school. I must stop consuming so much tea, it's drowning me. Must. Stop. Drinking. Tea. Bleargh.
Anyhow, during Biology/slack lesson today, I saw an enzyme called "Luciferase". Interesting.
And then, I was reading this interview about Dani Filth, it has been a long long while since I have been amused by the above-mentioned person, considering how uninspired he has been all this year. But this particular self-introduction reinstilled my faith in him. Here is it;
"Hell-o, my name is Dani Filth. I am the singer and lyricist for the metal band Cradle OF Filth. I live in the United Kingdom and my specialist subjects are Daleks, forbidden tantric sex and driving over the speed limit. I also have a three legged cat, my favourite colour is blood red and my ambitions are both world peace and world annihilation, depending on whether it's a Wednesday or not."
The last line especially got me. British humour for the winner! Dani, I sincerely hope I will have a good read from your Gospel of Filth occultohistoricomentary book.
Speaking about reading, I am enjoying Eco's How to travel with a salmon. He's increasingly becoming my newest favourite writer.
Alright now. I should do the YJC Maths paper. It sure feels odd without all the long days in school and tonnes of tutorials or revision shit, maybe it's a Monday thing, I can't get the hang of Mondays.
So yes, I am bored, not to the point of death, but enough to push me to do this little open ended Q&A. If you do not wish to read a whole pile of facts and answers then feel you have wasted 5 minutes of your worth(less) life, you have exactly 10 seconds to find your towel and leave the Earth. Starting. From. Now.
Ok! I can now fully assume you are ready to stare into the screen and receive light wavelengths from the computer screen.
Here it goes;
The person who tagged you is: Mister Jaspas Himself Your relationship with her (it's a him, by the way): Flourish buddy, accomplice in crime. Your 5 impressions of her (Him, god damn it): Crazy insane or insane crazy, could be profound sometimes, a real pleasure to chat flourish and all the other things about life with him. The most memorable thing she/he had done for you: To give recognition and inspiration in me for flourishing. And, not to forget, his commendable efforts in helping me get over Der Lepidoctor. The most memorable words that she had said to you: Hmm, this is a hard one. Many would say "Meow" or "..." is his most memorable word(s), but I would like to beg to differ. Hitherto, "I'm a lizard!!!!!" is the best. If there will be a chance, will she/him become your lover? Next! If she/he's your lover, what she has to improve on? Hmm, if I do really give a thought to this burning question. Listen to Norse Arsk Black Metal! =D If she/he becomes your enemy? Then, I will have to make friends with the table. "Hi table! Any new moves?" The reason why she/he becomes your enemy: When he preaches about God and Salvation, and denies Evolution. That is it. My threshold is that much. *points to ankle height* =) What will you like to do for her/him now? Eh, a good, long, relaxing chat? Your overall impression of her/him: "I'm a lizard!" says it all, motherfucker. How people around me will think of me: "Is she for real?" I don't know! Metalhead, satanist, too good with her cards (this, I have to agree to a full extent though), weirdo, fascist pig, blah. I don't really care, you know. What do I love about myself: For being LingNemesis. What do I hate myself? I suck at mathematics despite much common knowledge that I am really brainy, and for being born in the wrong fucking continent. I should be in Europe where there are 3252836 metal festivals per annum. Ah damn. The most ideal person I would like to be: Cross breed with homozygous dominant Jon Nodveidt, Buck Twins, Friedrich Nietzsche, Lucifer, Varg Vikernes and Siddhartha Buddha plus one X-chromosome. Perfect. Some words for those who care for me: "Kill them for me."
Pass this quiz to 10 ppl(stop using shortforms, I despise it, it's "people") tt(that, it's just 2 more letters.) u (you, ugh!) wish to know how they feel about you(see? You can do it right?).
1) Vika! 2) TheCuso 3) Nick "Mephistopheles" Burd, although he has got no blog or whatsoever. 4) Jaro Chase 5) Roddreck, The One Who Makes Me Laughs Incessantly At Home. 6) Jaspas Deck 7) Stuart 8) Alden 9) Darf, the friendly neighbourhood viking. 10) Kevin Ho!
Who is 2 having relationship with: Eh, some girl from his country, I infer from his msn display pictures. Is 9 a female/male: Female viking! Will it be good if 1 and 10 are to get together: Hmm, maybe. Both enjoys art and film to a certain extent. How about 3&4: Hell no. Nick is mine and I am His. 2 studying about: Some thing about business and statistics. When was the last time you'd chatted with 3: 10 Earth hours or so ago? What kind of music does 8 like? It was me who influenced his music taste! All hail Metal. =D 6 has any siblings? One brother. Will you woo 3? I'm not doubting your skills of observation, but can you look up? I am His. Now I am glad I placed "Nick" as #3. How about 7? Jane will probably slaughter me, but logically speaking, it's impossible. Nick will have his ways to keep me secure. ^^ Thou shalt not doubt Nick's vast capabilities. Is 4 single? Nope. Surname of 5: He is my brother, thus he is a proud descendant of Ng. Hobby of 5: Making fun of me - his sister. Lame jokes. Pranks. Bleach-watching. Professional gaming. 3 studying at: Oh, self-studying at the present moment. But he is planning to study to become a mental illness therapist. Have you ever developed feelings for 8? If you asked that 4 to 5 years ago, perhaps. Where does 9 live? Bukit Panjang, as I recalled for her heathen domain. What colour does 4 like? Black, if he decides it's metal mood. Are 1&3 best friends? Oops, not at the moment. I am sorry to hear it myself. Why? =( Does 7 like 2? If they did know each other, probably. But now? I am highly doubtful. How do you know 2? Wonderous thing called the Internet. Does 5 has pet? Nope, my house is pet-free, except for a few dingy fishes in the dwindling tank kept by my dad.
RadioNIHIL
After being many months as an avid reader of ANUS.com, only now did I found out about their online radioshow - RadioNIHIL, I have got to confess, it is probably the best fucking radioshow ever.
Great discussions of nihilism, wordly issues, religion, philosophy, music and arts, what a great embodiment of elements. They play great music too, including the great Dissection, with no commericals and bullcrap. Perfect.
Re-inspiration
Yet again, my all-time favourite teacher, Mr. Dalvey Neo, has successfully re-inspired me. We had a great chat at his table today when I went back to Nan Chiau High in the name of Teachers' Day. He's still the anti-religious, egocentric, extremely popular, cynical (although we have both toned down in that aspect) person that I absolutely enjoy talking with. I only got to know he is a deist today, which was relatively shocking, seeing how such a cynical person would still believe in a form of cosmic force or higher authority. I guess people do need a form of excuse or 'feel-good' factor to get by life.
After chatting with him, yet again, after so long of a hiatus, I certainly felt I have matured quite abit from what I used to be, even compared to early last year, when I was still into my rebellious/angsty/anti-Christian ways, which was redundant. I think I shocked, or surprised him quite abit by my recent decision to lean towards a more Buddhist stance in my philosophy and thought, which I am going to stick with for a long time.
All in all, I am just plain glad to have found such a great figure to look up towards, always up for a great chat on all things philosophical and everyday life, which never failed to make my day better. And, moreover, he listens to Pain, so that's another plus point. He introduced me to Nailbomb today, whose one of their song titles goes "While You Sleep, I Destroy Your World" and album name is "Proud To Commit Commerical Suicide". You just go "wow" when you know you have known such a great man whose musical tastes/thoughts are even more superior. Talking to him is such an pure pleasure, I just hope our friendship will last long into my adulthood and beyond, for I treasure such a great chatting/musing partner. And, I will definitely look forward to more book/music recommendation from him. Surely, I shall not disappoint him by doing decently well for my A Levels.
Mr. Dalvey Neo. You will always be my unceasing source of inspiration. Thank you, so much.
Metal-Listener. Card Flourisher. Aspiring Philosopher. Selective Mugger. Ubermensch-to-be. Inspired by Dharma. Nihilist. The Almost Misanthrope. Yogini. Film Enthusiast. Into everything Occult and the Esotercism. Anti-Pretentious Social Situations. Anti-Religion. Anti-Normal. Observer of This Fucked-Up World. Autodidact. Philomath. Capricorn Cusp Aquarius. Leo Ascendent. Taurus Moon Sign. Economic Left/Right: -1.88 Social Libertarian/Authoritarian: -2.05.
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